Well, he wasn’t exactly apprehended. But he did turn up. According to wire service reports –
“After a massive manhunt that spanned the continent from Georgia to California, Vladimir Stirling surrendered to authorities after being sighted driving very fast on Interstate 85 northeast of Atlanta.”
The following transcript is kinda almost exactly as it actually happened:
Officer: May I see your driver’s license please. Stirling: Vy certainly officer. Officer: Say, isn’t that a Russian accent? Stirling: No, officer. I haf neffer been to Russia. Officer: (Looking over the license.) Hmm, hmm. And I suppose the name Vladimir is Swedish. Stirling: No, sir. Vladimir Stirling. Ve are from Scotland. Officer: Uh, huh. Don’t try to fool me son. I’m a trained peace officer. You’re that handsome Russian kid everybody’s looking for — with the APB out of Arizona. Now, please step out of the car — slowly. And put your hands behind your head. Stirling: Vat gave me avay? Officer: Well son, there’s a Xeroxed picture of you on every telephone pole in Buford. And a very nice ‘Have You Seen Me’ portrait on the milk carton sitting on my kitchen table. From there it was easy. Say, is Lindsey Stirling really your sister?
The rest was history. Vladimir received two citations – one for exceeding the speed limit, and another for not calling home on Mother’s Day – and was then released on his own recognizance. A very repentant Russian called to wish me a Happy Father’s Day me on Monday night, (a day late), but just in time for Family Home Evening. It was a tear-filled reunion right out of a Hallmark Christmas special. “Vy vere you vorried,” he justified. “Ve had just wisited in April.” Very true. He certainly had me speechless there.
In any event I want to post a nation-wide thank you for helping me to get young Vladimir’s attention. I’m sure the age-enhanced photographs from the holidays helped in his identification. But facebook and divine intervention were the key factors in getting our son to break radio silence and come out of hiding. So the internet works – and so does prayer.
However, if Vladimir should vanish again – which is highly likely – let me post a couple of snapshots in order to be one step ahead of him this time.